Have you been bullied?

Bullying has become an increasing problem in schools today and is becoming more of a topic as awareness is being raised. It is shocking to look at the teen suicide rate and school shootings often related to bullying. Unfortunately this does not always end on the school ground, but can continue at universities, offices, friendship circles or even at home with parents. Sometimes we don't even need a second person in the equation, we just bully ourselves with our harsh thoughts or critical attitudes. 

Bullying takes on many forms and you might have been a victim without even realising it. The effects of bullying can break down your character, confidence, steal your joy and often be long-lasting. It is not something to be taken lightly. As adults we can look back and identify how these incidents changed the way that we perceive ourselves. Built-in lies from our childhood play over and over in our heads. Often we are so used to it that we don't even realise that the thought patterns are there.

These lies limit us physically, emotionally and spiritually and instil fear and doubt. It robs us of our childlike courage and determination and it forces us to settle for less. There's nothing worse than settling for less, because you don't think that you are worth more.

But you are valuable! Jesus didn't die on a cross so that you can settle for less and live with a poverty mindset. We are the children of a King and we have a great inheritance. Even though we deserved nothing, He gave us everything by His grace and mercy. We were not created to live downcast lives as per other peoples' opinions. We were created to live life and life in abundance in all the plans that God has for us. Jesus didn't die so that we should be limited. He came to set us free! He came to make us whole. He came to heal our brokenness. He came to teach us who we are in Him and what we can become. We are all unique and beautiful, created, formed and designed for a purpose beyond our imagination. Jesus takes us places!

He doesn't care what your school bully or friends said. He doesn't care what your mother or father said. He cares about you and values what He thinks about you and knows about you. He needs no second opinion. He knows what He destined you for and no one can take that from you. No one can steal your identity from you if you are rooted in Jesus. He is everything we need to be everything we can be.

I know that those harsh words are painful. I know that they have caused deep wounds and thought patterns, but nothing is too deep for God. Bring these thoughts to Him, bring these hurts to Him. He heals the pain and restores beautifully. You don't need to be anybody else, just be the beautiful you that He created you to be. Don't live according to other peoples' opinions of yourself, get God's opinion and live limitless!

“You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.” Song of Solomon 4:7

“Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 5:10

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Corinthians 5:17

PS. If you are a victim, please speak to someone, even though it is hard, please reach out to someone. You might think that no one cares, but believe me, God cares and if He cares then there’s someone else in this world that cares about you and will be willing to help you. He will not let you suffer alone. If you know of someone who is a victim, please reach out to them and support them. Make sure that you do not put yourself in harm’s way, but approach the situation with caution. You might be the only person who knows and cares. There are also help lines which you can phone, including suicide helplines. Please post a comment if you have tips or suggestions. Thank you all!

Photo credit:lurvely

The problem of pain

I don’t think that I have one friend who has not at some stage of in life asked “why?”. Why did this happen? Why does it hurt so much? Many books have been written on pain and suffering and why it exists in the world and I recently read another one. I’m not going to suggest that I have the answer to it all and I’m not sure if anyone really has the perfect answer as each situation is different, but I’m going to offer a thought that will hopefully be encouraging.

When God created man, He gave him free will. We can thus choose to do what we want to do on this earth, but of course carry the consequences as well. God desires to have a real relationship with us and for a relationship to be real there must be a choice to love each other. God did not want to create robots and force them to love Him. God has already shown His love to us, but it is the choice of each person whether or not to reciprocate this love. God took this chance by allowing Jesus to die so that each person can be in a relationship with Him, but God has no guarantee that each person will eventually choose Him and consequently many people has rejected Him.

“but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Rom 5:8

Instead people have chosen to follow their own selfish desires of greed, lust, envy and power leading to betrayal, adultery, anger, murder, oppression, strife, rivalry, slander and any other action imaginable to obtain more of what they desire. God has not made man to be evil, but made man with a choice and whether he chooses good or evil, it’s his choice. Unfortunately every action mentioned above will inflict pain and suffering on a person as a result of someone else’s actions. It was not God’s intention to expose the world to pain and suffering, but Adam and Eve had a choice and they chose to bring evil into the world by listening to Satan and betraying God.

God cannot just remove evil from the world as this would leave man without free will and choice, but what He can do is send someone who can identify with us in all our pain and suffering and eventually take us to heaven where there are no more tears of pain and suffering. Jesus can identify with each one of us in every way and can comfort us and carry us through any situation. He went through it all so that He can be it all for us in our time of need. There is no pain or suffering that He cannot relate to and He thus knows how you feel.

“For we do not have a high priest (Jesus) who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Romans 4:15-16

Jesus endured the cross in order for Him to become our hope in our darkest hours. God will never leave us or forsake us. Jesus was left alone at the cross, crushed and forsook so that we can never be left alone, crushed or forsaken by God. He has once and for all reconciled us to God and no one can separate us from Him.

Be encouraged and know that God is with you and that Jesus knows exactly what you are going through and He is here to comfort you. He has no intention of leaving you to walk this road on your own even if it means carrying you through the darkest hours. “But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Cor 12:9  

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.” Psalm 23:4

Song: You never let go - Matt Redman

Picture credit: smashinghub

Receive beauty for ashes

Picture credit: becauseofgrace

“The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor.

He has sent me to comfort the broken-hearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed.

He has sent me to tell those who mourn that the time of the Lord’s favour has come and with it, the day of God’s anger against their enemies.

To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,

a joyous blessing instead of mourning,

festive praise instead of despair.

In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory.” Isaiah 61:1-3

Isaiah is proclaiming of the One who is to come, Jesus, and that one day He will be all that the verses above announce Him to be. We see this prophesy fulfilled in Luke 4:18. Where Jesus reads the exact scripture from the scroll and says to the people: “Today this scripture has been fulfilled in your hearing”. It was customary for the Jews to read from the scrolls each Sabbath in the temple and the people would take turns in reading from the scrolls. They would continue reading in the scroll at the place where the last person ended. Luke tells the story of how it was Jesus’s turn to read from the scroll in the synagogue that day.

God’s timing was perfect as Jesus had no way of orchestrating the reading of scripture so that He would end up reading that specific scripture which would reveal to the people who He truly is. This was the first time in Jesus’s life where He proclaimed to the people that He is the Messiah and the people knew exactly what He meant as they have been waiting for the Messiah to come.  

As the Messiah, He has come to do the things listed in the verses above and more. He has come to take away the poverty, the broken hearts, captivity and mourning which you have received from this world. He has come to give beauty where there are ashes, joy where there is mourning and praise where there is despair. He has come to establish His people in righteousness like great oak trees, planted to proclaim His glory.

So I ask these questions today: Where in your life do you have ashes (burnt down hopes and dreams or mistakes you have made), mourning and despair? Where are you in need of freedom? Ask God today to give you hope in the places where you lost it all. Do not give up. Jesus has already made to you this promise that He will freely give to all who ask and receive. Do not hold on today to the ashes of the world, but give it to Jesus and receive beauty. Jesus has come to set the captives free.

Maybe you have lost a friend, parent or child? Maybe you have lost your job, health, honour or reputation?

“Instead of shame and dishonour, you will enjoy a double share of honour. You will possess a double portion of prosperity in your land and everlasting joy will be yours.” Isaiah 61:7

Do not let Satan convince you that all has been lost, stolen or beyond repair, God restores with a DOUBLE portion all that has been stolen from you and nothing is impossible for Him. Jesus says: “Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.” John 16:24

Dance with me - Jesus Culture  

Emotional pain: Ouch, it hurts..

I have never really dealt with death in my life as I have never lost someone that I immensely loved and cared for. I have been very fortunate so far, but I know inevitably it will happen and when that happens then maybe I'll rewrite this post. But for now I will talk about what I do know about.

Pain, emotional pain. The pain that makes you fall on the floor crying so hard that you think your insides are going to fall out. You feel like something inside broke beyond restoration and it hurts, it hurts so much and it's just so raw and so sore. Your heart is breaking, you feel betrayed, rejected, discouraged and you have no idea how you will move on beyond this point.

In that moment just cry out to God, just simply cry out, tell Him how you feel, how much it hurts and how angry you are. Scream if necessary and ask Him "why?" as many times as you'd like. He wants to hear from you, He loves you and He's not judging you. He knows how you feel and He wants you to be honest with Him about what's in your heart. He knows what is in your heart already, so just tell Him the truth in all harshness. He can deal with it. He wants to comfort you and He wants to give you peace and rest. Pain is relative, everybody reacts differently to situations and just because your pain might look less important in relation to pain in the world, does not mean that it’s not important. What’s important to you, is important to God.

"He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds." Psalm 147:3

I want to let you know that you will make it through, that you are not alone and that your heart can heal. You might have a scar, but no wound. Nothing missing and nothing broken. It is so important that you speak about your heartache. Do not bottle it up and deal with it alone. You will be surprised how many people there are who have suffered in the same way and who is willing to walk this road with you. Do not be ashamed and do not isolate yourself. Satan will do anything to keep you hurting. He will convince you that people don't care, that they are too busy or that they think you are pathetic. Do not believe his lies. You are not alone!

If your hurt relates to a loved one: You will never forget your loved one or the time you spent together, but don't let this pain dictate the basis for future happiness, friendships or relationships. It will if you do not let the wound heal properly. Jesus is the great comforter and there is no wound that He cannot heal. We must only be willing and He will do the rest. Take a step towards this journey with Him, even if it means going back a few years to the origin of the hurt, just take a small step and He will lead you in the most beautiful way.

Also:

1. Cry, a lot, as much as you want to and need to.

2. Rest, give yourself a break and look after yourself.

3. Eat, every food that you love.

Enter into God's rest and remember that you are incredibly loved by the One who holds the universe in His hands.

"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart, I have overcome the world." John 16:33

"You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? Then my enemies will turn back in the day when I call. This I know, because God is for me. In God whose word I praise, in the Lord, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can man do to me?" Psalm 56:8-11